For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Of the increase of his government and peace
there will be no end.
He will reign on David's throne
and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it
with justice and righteousness
from that time on and forever.
The zeal of the LORD Almighty
will accomplish this.
--Isaiah 9:6-7
Well, that's me done. I hope you all have a great, relaxing Christmas and New Year's.
See you in 2009. It's been swell!
Well, this is my second last day of work. I really have absolutely no desire whatsoever to draw. My well is dry. I am so excited about taking a break from everything here, and getting away.
I'll finish up on the blog tomorrow too, and take a couple of weeks off. Being the hi-tech guy I am, I've scheduled a couple of 'holiday posts', but apart from that, I won't write for a while. That well is kinda dry too.
I was thinking about new years resolutions, and I remembered that my one for this year was to start a blog. It's nice to be able to tick that off and for once have actually carried through with a resolution. In early January, I will have been blogging for a year. I've really enjoyed having somewhere to put my thoughts every day, and to have a bit of a chat with different people, so thanks:)
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
--James 5:16
Bonhoeffer says the pious isolation of not confessing our sins to each other is 'the last stronghold of self- justification.'(p.112), because the root of all sin is pride.
If we never admit to out short-comings, if we don't own up to our failures, if we never apologise and ask forgiveness of those we hurt, we can try to maintain the appearance of being pretty good people. We can maintain the opinion of our relative innocence.
Yeah, I've done some dumb things, but at least I'm not like that guy over there. No regrets. Live and learn. In this proud isolation we are not free; there is no peace in being alone.
Sin demands to have a man by himself. It withdraws him from the community. The more isolated a person is, the more destructive will be the power of sin over him, and the more deeply he becomes involved in it, the more disastrous is his isolation. Sin wants to remain unknown. (p.112)
And so God gives us community, gives us a brother.
our brother breaks the circle of self-deception. A man who confesses his sins in the presence of a brother knows that he is no longer alone with himself; he experiences the presence of God in the reality of the other person. As long as I am by myself in the confession of my sins everything remains in the dark. (p.116)
So, we should be so thankful to God, for the gift of Christian brothers and sisters to whom we can confess, and have insurance against self-deception and assurance of forgiveness.
Well, that's Book Group II. It's been a great book to read, and I have benefited a lot by thinking through these different aspects of community.
The girls came in to my work yesterday arvo for my work family Christmas party (there seems to be about thirteen different parties at my work. Tomorrow is the one just for people with red hair).
Little e had a go on my computer and drew this picture. It's quite telling--
E.C. McLaughlin, Untitled (2008)
I must have skipped over that verse..
How's your bible reading going?
I've recently changed my habits, as it wasn't working out very well. I had been reading the bible on the bus every morning on the way to work, but found it pretty difficult to properly concentrate and not get distracted. I also stated to resent it a bit, as what I really wanted to do on the bus ride was read a novel. So, it was kind of getting a bit unhealthy.
What I've been doing for the past few days is getting up 45 minutes earlier than usual, and doing my reading before I get ready for work (after a shower and coffee to wake up). Getting up earlier sucks, and it's really hard to do, but once it's underway, it's been great. I am concentrating far better, and getting through a lot more. I'm reading Genesis, Acts and Psalms- not necessarily a whole chapter of each, sometimes just a little chunk.
But it's had such a positive impact on my days, and has made reading feel like less of a chore, something I should be doing.
How's yours going? When's the best time for you?
My Christmas lunch the other day was nice. The food was as awesome as I remembered. Here's what I had--
Entree- Pork belly. Kurobuta sweet, double cooked and served with black pudding, apple and elderflower puree.
Main- Beef, chargrilled sirloin with roasted golden beetroots and potato fondant
Dessert- A selection of Australian and international cheeses
I probably shouldn't have gone the cheese. I like cheese, but only cheese that is yellow. Cheese has no business being anything other than yellow. But I was feeling adventurous.
There was one cheese that was so thickly coated in furry green mould, that when I tapped it, a cloud of green dust poofed off of it. Spores. It is a sad and sick world when spores become food. It tasted vaguely nice, but sort of like nice cheese that has been sitting in someones dirty, damp sock for a week.
It was a big weekend. I feel exhausted this morning! If I listed what we did, it may not seem like that much, but it just took it out of me. Being at work this morning feels like a bit of a rest!
Anyway, it's a really beautiful day today, and I am feeling happy. This is my last week of work, and that feels great. I'm taking two weeks off, and after Christmas the girls and I are going down to Kangaroo Valley for a week. I am looking forward to it sooooo much. A chance to just stop and relax for a while, and get away from everything here.
What are your plans? Taking some time off? Getting away?
I'd love to get this album, For Emma, Forever Ago by Bon Iver.
After a breakup, this guy went and stayed in a cabin in the woods by himself for three months, and made this album. I've been listening to lots of it on YouTube.
This one is a beauty.
We have our work Christmas lunch today, and I gotta say, I am pretty amped. I love eating out at fancy restaurants, particularly because I do it pretty rarely. We are going to Aria, at Circular Quay, which is run by that guy Matt Moran, the chef bloke from that show, The Chopping Block.
We went there last year too, and it was fancy-pantsy, with amazing food. Two words-- pork belly. Oh mama.
I had a bit of a strange night last night. Not much sleep, and some bad dreams. One was particularly frightening.
I was in a crowded shopping centre, and gradually I became aware of a slow, repetitive siren alarm thing. Everyone else started to become aware, and there was all this murmuring of confusion, as people didn't know what they were supposed to do.
It was then announced over a loud speaker that a man with a gun had just arrived at the airport, and was making his way on foot to the shopping centre. Everyone was told to hide. In dream logic, there was no way to get away, and this approaching figure made everyone absolutely paralysed with fear. There was just this absolutely dreadful inevitability to it.
I woke up just as the man entered the shopping centre, which was a relief, but I still now, hours later, have this uneasy feeling because of it.
E and I have been discussing baby names on and off for a while now, and are slowly reaching some sort of agreement. It's hard work.
We have different tastes (I like good names, whereas she likes bad ones) and so a lot of debating takes place.
It was probably for the best that God in His wisdom waited until Adam had named all the animals, before creating Eve. Adam was unfettered, and could just sit down on a rock and rattle them off quick-- bam, bam, bam.
Cow. Horse. Bandicoot. Blackburnian Warbler. Done.
Maybe we need to go back to this Biblical model.
To forego self-conceit and to associate with the lowly means, in all soberness and without mincing the matter, to consider oneself the greatest of sinners. (p.96)
Because of my humanity, this is so hard to do. I have a knee-jerk reaction to this that makes me want to justify myself, and to weigh my sin on human scales to those around me. Am I really that bad? Yes.
It is important to grasp the blanket loathing that God has for sin. I assume that because of His huge capacity for forgiveness, that He doesn't mind those little sins that much. They aren't that big a deal. If He can forgive some murderer, then me doing this isn't that bad. But it really is, because God sees all sin as the same, not on a scale of 1 to 10. Even the tiniest sin is loathsome to Him, and intolerable.
In this way we condemn ourselves, because we try to gain acceptance based on our track record. God says that if we try this route, nobody will be found righteous. Nobody at all (Romans 3:20). You could stop here, and see God as an unreasonably harsh judge. But how great must His love be, that though we were turned away from Him, He would punish in our place, the One most dear to Him, the One who had never turned away from Him, the One who was in perfect relationship to Him.
And amazingly, by seeing myself with nothing to bring to the table, I am instantly raised into that same perfect relationship as His Son. With nothing to prove, I am proven perfect, through the redemptive act of Jesus dying in my place.
If my sinfulness appears to me to be in any way smaller or less detestable in comparison with the sins of others, I am still not recognizing my sinfulness at all...How can I possibly serve another person in unfeigned humility if I seriously regard his sinfulness as worse than my own? (p96-97)
I have developed a bit of a taste for poached eggs. I like that they aren't as greasy as fried ones. I have been giving it a burl, but my results have not been very pretty. Tried again this morning, and it wasn't too bad, but still a bit weird.
I found some hints at this site, which I might try. My biggest problem is trying to avoid what they call 'skeins of protein tangling up in the water'. Eww. I don't know what a skein is, but I'm pretty certain I don't want to eat one.
That's been my biggest downfall-- the whites all separating and going all gross. The yolks have been pretty spot on though. I've been adding a bit of vinegar, which helps, but I think balsamic was a bad choice. The egg white becomes egg beige.
Any experts with some tips?
Better a little with the fear of the Lord
than great wealth with turmoil.
--Proverbs 15:16
I'm a hopelessly chronic nailbiter. It's a sickness that I can't find a remedy for. If there is any 'white' at the top, it has to go.
Anyways, I am currently making another attempt at quitting. It's been three days. There's about 1.5 mm of white.
I'm hurting.
Last night I dreamt that I was in a band, and we wrote a song, which in the dream seemed very funny and witty. When I woke up I still had the tune and lyrics in my head, and wrote them down. Check out this awesomeness--
I need the soul of a woman, and the heart of a man,
Though in the meantime I'm doing the best I can
I need the soul of a woman, and the heart of a man.
Not sure what it means, but it's obviously very poignant and deep. It's also copyright, so don't get any ideas.
Last night I was keen to get home, and was willing the train to go faster. It had been a long day, I had a headache, and a storm was on its way. The train pulled out of Redfern, the next stop was mine, Strathfield. I started reading to pass the time.
Next thing I know, the announcer says 'train now arriving at Parramatta'.
Awww man.
Note to self- read indicator board before boarding train.
'The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.' --Genesis 2:18
'How many of you ladies feel like your husband is considerably different to you in a number of ways? Oftentimes those differences become points of conflict in the marriage. They should be points of vitality.
If I need a helper who is suited to help me, then it would make sense that she would be strong where I am weak. If she's good at what I'm good at, she's not very helpful. I don't need help in my strength, I need help where I'm blind, where I'm negligent, where I'm in lack.' (Mark Driscoll)
The more I think about it, the more I realise how much my wife compliments me, and strengthens me where I am weak. There are some considerable differences between us, but these have been so beneficial.
For example, I am more inclined to joke about things and people, sometimes to the point where I am mocking or being critical. To some extant I think this is okay, and just the way I've been made, but also I think it is something that needs to be kept in check, and my wife helps me do that.
She is a very gentle, uncritical person, rarely with a bad word to say about anyone, and these traits in her are just what is needed to reign me in. She gently rebukes me, and I am very thankful for that. Rather than saying, 'oh, you don't understand me, we are too different', I should rejoice that we are different.
How great that God made her the way He did, and led me to her --my suitable helper.
What emotions do you feel when you see this picture?
I know a little girl who if she saw this, her heart would skip a beat, she would let out a high pitch squeal, and she'd point and stare at it, as though she'd just struck gold. She would fall into a deep trance of unfathomable joy.
This is Iggle Piggle, from the strange, surreal, and inherently evil children's program, In The Night Garden.
Young parents will know the strangle-hold this show has on our children. This so-called Iggle Piggle and his accomplices, Makka Pakka and Upsy Daisy somehow tap into a child's mind in a manner akin to hysteria. This is the scourge of Generation Z, the poisoning cancer of a new wave of impressionable minds.
I have formed a committee to fight this disease. Fight we must, for the love of our children. The first committee meeting will be next Tuesday night at the old mill.
Bring your pitch forks.
At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery.
They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.
But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"
"No one, sir," she said.
"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
--John 8:2-11
Passed some people in the lift, and they said "Have you got your costume ready for the Christmas party tonight?"
I couldn't bring myself to say that I wasn't going, so I just said "not yet". Bad, huh?
I feel a bit guilty about not going, but also feel chuffed that later tonight, rather than be at some lonely old bus stop, trying to get home, I'll be asleep in my bed.
Give me a bed over a party any day.
Just so you know, I am pro Britney.
Yeah, yeah, I know she has done some stupid stuff, but she's also been put through the wringer. The media have way more to be ashamed of for the way they've crucified her over the past couple of years, than she does.
And I don't care what anyone says, that song 'Gimme More' rocks. Go Brits.
I lift up my hands to your commands, which I love,
and I meditate on your decrees.
--Psalm 119:48
Meditation
I have been thinking about meditation this week, and pondering how I can work this better in to my life. Also I have been thinking about the logistics of Christian meditation, and how it differs from what the word 'meditation' evokes these days.
Buddhist meditation for example seems to be more about emptying the mind, whereas Bonhoeffer says that Christian meditation
'does not let us down into the void and abyss of loneliness; it lets us be alone with the Word. And in so doing it gives us solid ground on which to stand and clear directions as to the steps we must take.' (p81)
He also says that the fundamental rule is to 'seek God, not happiness', but that when we do seek God alone, we 'will gain happiness: that is a promise' (p84). So it seems less about becoming empty for emptiness' sake, but become empty to allow space for the Word to dwell in us richly.
This week I have been attempting to meditate on the passage from Ephesians 6 that Con preached on last Sunday, about putting on the armour of God. I've been just focusing on a phrase or a sentence rather than the whole chunk, and trying to let those words get through to me in a deeper way.
To be honest, I haven't found it that successful so far. My mind wanders a lot, and I have not chosen a very wise setting for my meditation. The bus ride in the morning is loud, and crowded, and doesn't really lend itself to peaceful reflection. I am thinking that the best time would be really early in the morning, when I am alone and it is quiet. It would take discipline, but I'm sure it would be invaluable.
I found this passage from the chapter to be a good encouragement to press on--
'Often we are so burdened and overwhelmed with other thoughts, images, and concerns that it may take a long time before God's Word has swept all else aside and come through. But it will surely come, just as surely as God Himself has come to men and will come again.' (p82)
Okay, this is the last one, and then I've got it all off my chest. I pass this shop on my way to work. Look at this signage and logo--
Now I don't know about you, but I'm never, ever going to buy a bed or mattress from this shop, and it's solely because of the logo. What the hell is that white thing in the green square? The word 'skittering' is the first word that comes to my mind, followed closely by the words 'bed bug'.
Come on! What are you doing?! I just don't understand what you're thinking. I want you to do well and to be a successful shop, I honestly do. But you're advertising mattresses with a bedbug, you frustrating, frustrating people!
While feeling guilty towards these people, I also feel anger. I both pity them and despise them. Look at your shop. What are you thinking? You're doing it all wrong. I passed a deserted looking kebab shop this morning with a big fancy advertisement out the front saying 'catering for Christmas parties available'. Come on, is this really where you should be directing your advertising funds? Kebab Christmas parties?
"Kate, I'll leave it to you to plan the food for the company Christmas party. What were you thinking? Go out on our yacht and get some nice catering, maybe sushi and some nice wine?"
"We could do that, but no, I was thinking why don't we just order a few kebabs, and maybe a couple of 750ml bottles of Sprite and have it here at the office?"
"Kate, you're a genius!"
It frustrates me that I'm so affected by guilt when walking in to little shops. Especially those strange, badly situated, badly stocked and ludicrously overpriced little shops. The shop is always empty except for you and the shopkeeper, and maybe a smelly old dog or cat asleep on the floor. Everything in the shop, including the shopkeeper and now you, is covered in a fine layer of dust and animal hair. You suddenly feel the need to itch. There is complete silence. You may be the first customer here since the early 90's.
But this is not my problem! Why do I feel guilty that I don't want to buy your horrible old half rotten capsicum? Why can't I just leave, without hanging my head in shame? You're the one with the horrible shop. You're the one with with rubbish products.
But alas, I can't shake the guilt, and am prone to buy out of charity. I did come here looking for a loaf of bread, but since that is only $11, sure, I'll buy your old crusty two pack of light globes for $9 as well. Then it's an even $20.
Oh! Nearly forgot--
Happy first day of Summer!
We watched that movie Atonement on the weekend, one of many movies from the past couple of years that we never got around to seeing. I thought it was really good actually. Not too chickflicky or contrived, and really well made. It even overcame the pretty big handicap of starring Keira Knightly, which let's face it, is quite a feat.
On a less positive note, I also somehow found myself watching a movie called Camp Rock on tele on the weekend too. This may have been the worst movie ever, and may have turned my stomach more than any movie I have seen in my thirty one years of life.
Three more weeks of work. Fifteen days. One hundred and twenty hours.
Not that I'm counting.
Only 24 more sleeps! We put our Christmas tree up yesterday afternoon. It was fun. I whacked on my prized Carpenters Christmas Collection album, which got us in the mood nicely. It was nice to see little e experiencing it all-- Christmas is so fun when you're a little kid.
Are you putting a tree up this year?
A wise man fears the Lord and shuns evil,
but a fool is hotheaded and reckless.
--Proverbs 14:16
I was reminded this morning about why I'm not a dog person. I don't mind the actual animals so much, it's more the sick relationship that they have with humans.
Twice on my way to work I saw dogs crouching in that mildly obscene way, lightening their load. And a couple of metres away, there was the obligatory manservant with his hand wrapped in a little blue plastic bag, head bowed, ready to serve. On the face, that dead expression that said 'I know this is wrong. I know the depths I have sunk to, but I just can't seem to climb out of this deep pit I'm in'. It really is very sad.
Is this the way things are meant to be? Has Creation not been turned on its' head? My guess is that before The Fall, dogs had workable thumbs so that they could wield their own little blue plastic bags.
For to us a child is born,
Well, that's me done. I hope you all have a great, relaxing Christmas and New Year's.
How's your bible reading going?
We have our work Christmas lunch today, and I gotta say, I am pretty amped. I love eating out at fancy restaurants, particularly because I do it pretty rarely. We are going to Aria, at Circular Quay, which is run by that guy Matt Moran, the chef bloke from that show, The Chopping Block.
I had a bit of a strange night last night. Not much sleep, and some bad dreams. One was particularly frightening.
E and I have been discussing baby names on and off for a while now, and are slowly reaching some sort of agreement. It's hard work.
To forego self-conceit and to associate with the lowly means, in all soberness and without mincing the matter, to consider oneself the greatest of sinners. (p.96)
I have developed a bit of a taste for poached eggs. I like that they aren't as greasy as fried ones. I have been giving it a burl, but my results have not been very pretty. Tried again this morning, and it wasn't too bad, but still a bit weird.
I'm a hopelessly chronic nailbiter. It's a sickness that I can't find a remedy for. If there is any 'white' at the top, it has to go.
Last night I was keen to get home, and was willing the train to go faster. It had been a long day, I had a headache, and a storm was on its way. The train pulled out of Redfern, the next stop was mine, Strathfield. I started reading to pass the time.
'The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.' --Genesis 2:18
At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery.
Passed some people in the lift, and they said "Have you got your costume ready for the Christmas party tonight?"
Just so you know, I am pro Britney.
I lift up my hands to your commands, which I love,
It frustrates me that I'm so affected by guilt when walking in to little shops. Especially those strange, badly situated, badly stocked and ludicrously overpriced little shops. The shop is always empty except for you and the shopkeeper, and maybe a smelly old dog or cat asleep on the floor. Everything in the shop, including the shopkeeper and now you, is covered in a fine layer of dust and animal hair. You suddenly feel the need to itch. There is complete silence. You may be the first customer here since the early 90's.
We watched that movie Atonement on the weekend, one of many movies from the past couple of years that we never got around to seeing. I thought it was really good actually. Not too chickflicky or contrived, and really well made. It even overcame the pretty big handicap of starring Keira Knightly, which let's face it, is quite a feat.
I was reminded this morning about why I'm not a dog person. I don't mind the actual animals so much, it's more the sick relationship that they have with humans.
