Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)
Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Trade Secrets

Have you ever suspected that bus drivers see a group of people signalling, and stop, with pinpoint accuracy so that the pretty lady or the old person can get on first? Have you then disregarded this suspicion as paranoia? Don't be so hasty. Yesterday I was let in on some trade secrets.

I was waiting at a bus stop with a few other people. As the bus came in to view, I took my position and signalled first. The other people then tardily got in to their positions, in front of me, and needlessly signalled as well.

However, to my happy surprise, the bus doors stopped exactly and precisely in the spot so that I could get on first, before the interlopers.

As I smiled at the driver, he leaned over and divulged his special tactic with me, in whispered solemnity--

'Always aim for the bloke who signalled first', he said. 'Part of the system, you see'.

It was a great honour to be taken in to the bus drivers' circle of trust, a place I would not trade for all the worlds' riches.


Stuart Heath said...

Now that I know someone on the inside, I'd be keen to find out: is there also a system for when they refuse to stop at all, or when none come for an hour, then three all at once? Knowing that system would make Sydney buses almost usable.

Ben McLaughlin said...

It's not so much a system, as an attitude, that attitude being 'spite'.