I really liked this post Simone wrote the other day.
It made me think about what I would like other people to understand better about me.
Here's my 10:
1. I'm not shy. I just have a stutter, and try to avoid talking around groups of people. Sometimes I'll use pretend shyness as an excuse for mono-syllabic answers, but it's a facade.
2. I poke fun at you because I like you, not because I don't. Generally people get this, but there are friends who get offended by my jokes, and take things to heart. So I secretly roll my eyes and have to chuck in a boring "just kidding", to appease them. I mock because I love. If I didn't like you I wouldn't joke with you.
3. I like to be alone. There's nothing wrong, I'm not in a bad mood, I just like to be by myself a lot, to think and do my own thing.
4. I want to talk about passion. I like people who have interests, and I like to listen to you talk about the things you're passionate about, especially if they are a bit left of centre. And I really, really want to talk to you about the things I'm passionate about.
5. I don't want to talk about achievement. When groups of males talk together, there tends to be a sense of competition. This makes my eyes glaze over. I'm really happy to talk about you, but not about your status symbols, how highly paid and highly skilled you are, how expensive or fast your car is.
6. I like having friends of both sexes. Don't be alarmed if I talk to you and you are a girl. "Eek, why is he talking to me, and not my husband?" I'm not being creepy, I'm just being friendly. I relate to girls about as well as guys (ie, equally badly).
7. I want deep relationship, at intervals. This is a bit tricky and hard to navigate. But while I want a deep friendship with you, and want to skip the small-talk, I need it to be a bit spaced-out. I don't want to have a heart to heart every single day. Neediness frightens me.
8. I need warning. Don't drop in on me, or ask me to something without warning. Don't change plans on me at the last minute. I need to mentally prepare and have time to get excited about things.
9. I'm a one-to-one kinda guy. In a group I'll be a bit stand off-ish and reserved. I feel out of my element. But one to one, I will be relaxed and open with you.
10. I'm opinionated about my tastes. Be aware that if you tell me about something you like, chances are I will either think the thing is awesome, or rubbish. I have no grey areas here. Don't get offended, just tell me to pull my head in, and tell me why I'm wrong (although you won't be able to, because I'm right).