Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)
Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Scar Tactics

A friend of mine recently had an accident with some kind of power saw. It jumped up and cut his cheek, and he had to get several stitches. It was a miracle that it didn't do more damage- get his eye or ear or something. He was left with a pretty decent scar.

I don't want to trivialise my friends' near miss, but, to be honest, I've always kind of wanted a cool scar. One that would make me look cooler and tougher than I look now. (Did you see what I did there? Not sure if I'm being big headed or self deprecating are you? That's how intricate the web that I weave is to the naked eye).

Back on topic, I wouldn't want the scar to be too drastic and disfiguring, just a cool nick here or there. Like I've been in a dangerous tussle and lived to tell the tale. But only just.

A prerequisite for a scar to be cool is that it can't be too symmetrical. I only have one decent scar, but it's silly looking and symmetrical, so it in no way qualifies as being cool. It's a shiny round circle on the back of my head. Very circular, very pink, very shiny, very symmetrical. According to legend, it occurred soon after I was born, when the nurses took me away to be weighed or something or other. Maybe they swung me by the legs and accidentally clipped a passing trolley doing the rounds or something. Hard to say. They denied any responsibility. But look at me now, nurses. LOOOK AT MEEEEEEE! Avert your eyes, children!

Because of it's perfectly formed symetricalityness, it doesn't even look much like a scar, let a lone a cool one. I once had someone mistake it for a USB port and try to plug in their thumb drive there. Another person treated it like a miniature pregnant belly and patted it, cooing, "Awwww" lovingly. Still a third person gave it a rub, before standing back waiting for a genie to come out.

Not cool.


Pedro said...

"Gotta earn 'em buddy" I was once told.
Apparently so.
Want to borrow the bike?

Ben McLaughlin said...

yeah. nuh.

Laetitia :-) said...

My sister got a 'dimple' from running into something (I think it was the back of the ute) and a long scar on her knee from being picked up too close to a house, or rather, too close to a stump of said house. Her knee caught on a jagged ant cap on top of the stump.

I got a scar under my lip from falling off the piano stool onto the piano when I was about 4 years old. Acne scarring obliterated it later though.

buckleboy said...

Do you know James Hansen? I had s man-crush on him long before such things were cool. And it was primarily due to a totally awesome facial scar. Down one cheek diagonally, four or five cm long. His face is rather perfect without it so I can only assume we are wired to prefer uniqueness, ratter than perfection.

Ben McLaughlin said...

If I remember correctly the Hansen family were pretty much hot in general. I do remember his scar though. A corker.