Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)
Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Friday, November 22, 2013

The Work Iron

I would wear more collared shirts if they didn't require ironing. Ironing is a drainer. It unnecessarily saps your life.

I'm going to the girls' dancing concert tonight though, so I brought a shirt with me. But it's pretty crinkled, so I'm going to use The Work Iron. Actually I'm using it right now as I type. Do you know what The Work Iron is? You wouldn't, because I just invented it.

What I've done, is folded it very neatly, and have put the folded garment on my chair. And now I'm sitting on it. Not unlike a broody hen. The combined warmth and weight of my trousered buttocks (sorry) seem to be producing a very satisfactory result. A couple more hours of nesting and I should be good to go, said garment crisp and tidy.

Results may vary.

9 comments:

Hanny said...

Sailors used to do something like this in the navy--when they had bunks, anyway. They would take their dress blues and turn them inside out and then put them under the mattress of their bunks. Then when they needed their dress uniforms they were all pressed and ready to go. This is why American navy uniforms today are ironed all funny; that's how they used to be stuffed under mattresses.

ALaird said...

Can we get a photo of the results? Interested to see said product...

Belle said...

I love the idea, but I have so many questions! Is it a long-sleeved shirt, and if so, does your buttocks (sorry) cover the entire length of the arm? Or are the wristy bits not very crinkled and so don't need much pressing? (Maybe you're planning to roll up your sleeves... that makes sense... Moving on...)

Are you sitting very still so that you don't accidentally iron in a new crease by shifting said buttocks (sorry)? Also, is it just me who stops moving my neck/head so much when I'm aware that I can't shift my bottom at all?

I, too, would be interested in seeing photos.

Enjoy the concert. :)

Ben McLaughlin said...

Hanny- Yep, those Navel types totally stole the idea from me

Lairdy- You might be underwhelmed because you didnt see a before shot. It was in quite a state. Now it's in much less of a state. Maybe just a capital territory.

Belle- I folded it up fairly small, the sleeves folded also, forming a rectangle the size of a magazine. Yep, long sleeves. It's quite a thin fabric, and responded favouarbly to the (sorry) buttocking.

I was sitting pretty still, but the swivel mechanism of the office chair allowed me to interact with my peers and colleagues without too much conspicuosity.

Deb said...

You could be on to something. But we'll need photographic evidence.

Ben McLaughlin said...

Oh ye of little faith.

Jessica said...

Hey I've done that too. When traveling. Pull shirt out of bag, spread it smoothly on bed, have a nice lie down, TA DAAAA!!!!!!!! Close enough to ironed!

Ben McLaughlin said...

When I was doing it, it occurred to me to be a bit of a Jellsie thing to do!

Jessica said...

I am SO honoured, and also congratulations for blogging it before it occurred to me :)