Keanu Roach

We'd run out of coffee yesterday, so I had to use decaf in the plunger at breakfast time. The taste was okay, but it did nothing to lift my head-fog, and so I had a headache for most of the day. It made me feel very cross towards decaf. What's the point? It's like eating a Big Mac only to feel healthy and well-nourished. Purpose: defeated.

Anyways, it was with great excitement that this morning I poured newly purchased ACTUAL coffee into the plunger for me and E. So I pour the water in, and put the plunger lid thing on, and push it down a bit, leaving it to sit a mo while I make my Vegemite toast, and then I hear this skitter skitter kind of noise. I look around, but can't find the source. Skitter skitter, there it is again. It has a very six-legged vibe to it. But I can't locate it, so I get on with the toast.

Then, licking my chops, I go to complete the plunger-pushing-down action, and there, as the steel plunger flat bit slowly decends towards the hot black coffee, I locate the skitter skitter source.

There, standing in a thrill-seeking manner, is a cockroach on the plunger platform. I think he thought he was Keanu Reeves in that movie Speed, fooling about in elevator shafts, climbing up on to the roofs of lifts and whatnot.

Pop quiz, hotshot- who's going to be burned alive in the sink by boiling hot kettle water, and eventually pushed through the drain with the end of a teaspoon?

NOTE: E, don't worry, I washed the plunger bit thoroughly before continuing with making your coffee. I thought it best not to bring up this escapade with you until after you'd finished drinking. I hope you understand.