Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)
Huldra Forsvant (Theodor Kittelsen)

Monday, July 11, 2011

Wrap Schmap

You know what I have no time for? Wraps. When did wraps start getting more cred than a regular sandwich? Probably the same sick and twisted day that those ridiculous seaweed crackers overtook the tried and true Jatz. What a joke.

Wraps look all fancy and healthy, but they have no taste. At least bread has taste. Chew for a minute and it's just a mouth of gross dough. And unless you eat a wrap within twenty seconds of actually making it, it tastes rubbish. It gets all wet and sloppy at the end with tomato juices and whatnot. Foul.

I feel strongly about this, and think some sort of anti-wrap campaign is in order. Maybe a petition. Possibly a march. Who's with me? I'll meet you at the old mill at midnight tonight.


Jessica said...

I've always liked wraps. I like the filling-security of a tightly wrapped wrap. But now you've spoiled them for me.

Ben McLaughlin said...

It's not so much that I've spoiled them for you, but rather that I have peeled the scales away to reveal the truth that deep down you already knew. For real.

Alistair Bain said...

I'm totally with you Ben.

Like eating what might be a nice salad in soft cardboard.

Ben McLaughlin said...

Exactly. Ditch the tasteless middleman and eat a nice salad.

Crazyjedidiah said...

But the good thing about a wrap is that you can have more filling and less bread which is always the least exciting part.

Laetitia :-) said...

The bread used for wraps is good for kebabs.

Laetitia :-) said...

Oh, and they often have less yeast than regular bread so they work for people who have problems with yeast.

Wendy said...

Sorry, I cannot agree with you here. Wraps are great – especially because the kids love them. They also have numerous uses - layer them in the slow cooker (another one of your favourite hates, I know Ben), pizza bases, lunches etc.

Ben McLaughlin said...

cj- sometimes less bread, but sometimes you get a bit with about 15 layers of wrap, and it's like eating glue.

simone- exactly. no point.

Laetitia- kebabs are a completely different kettle of fish. For starters, they are toasted and crispy. And they have awesome homus and tabouli. wraps are like raw kebabs.

Wendy- you wrong me. I LOVE my slow cooker. And your examples are ways of using wraps not like a wrap, which only proves my point.

Steve said...

Toast it... oh- and I know why u need to chew food for over a minute (mum's the word!).

Crazyjedidiah said...

But Ben, the wrap bread is tastier than normal bread

RodeoClown said...

I was going to disagree with you Ben, but then I realised that I was thinking of a kebab - which is awesome, not a wrap - which is decidedly less so.

So, to clarify:
Kebabs = Awesomesauce
Wraps = boring.

In the same vein, I think Subway is a stupid shop, except for their toasted buns. Why would I ever buy a sandwich (or wrap), when I could buy something cooked instead!

Ben McLaughlin said...

'Why would I ever buy a sandwich (or wrap), when I could buy something cooked instead!'

Spot on, mate. We think the same.